There was a scholarship opportunity that came across my desk. It was intended for married persons, but sorta/kinda open to everyone. While I considered applying, I ultimately did not. Below is my un-submitted essay:
My name is Jared Robbins and I am an MFA candidate in Creative Writing at UCR. I am not married, but not by choice. It's just that I haven't found a mate yet who fits the bill. And not by any lack of effort on my part -- Lord knows, I've been looking. In malls, bars, under seats; on airplanes, dating websites, and the lot. But one knows that you can't force these things. That said, I still believe the Neumann scholarship would prove of great benefit to me. I am a writer; writers are poor; and single writers are people too. I walk through family housing every day on my way to school. It is the most serene part of my day -- that is, when it's not raining. There are always half-clothed little kids running around and laundry blowing on the line; I see the mountains in the distance and imagine I'm in a bucolic faraway land. My work is interdisciplinary: I write drama, short fiction, and poetry. Regular motifs include, but are not limited to, loss of innocence, brotherly bonds, unrequited love, eccentric characters, and thick spectacles. It is informed by a diverse background that includes a bachelors degree in political-science, a grandpa who lived to the age of 97, and a year spent teaching in Asia. The Neumann scholarship would enable me to focus more on my writing and less on determining which Subway sandwiches are still on special for five dollars.